![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Oh, Internet. There are days that I tell myself that I don't need you anymore, that I have wearied of your fleeting attractions, that you've lost your luster.
And then, as I surf your endless ocean, I find something like this, a sentence so wondrous in its badness that I bow before its awesome power.
...my cunt makes a disappointed queeb sound as we separate.
No, this immortal nugget of prose springs not from bad fanfiction or from the blog of a horny but inexperienced teenager. It comes from published "profic," and there's more where that came from.
Behold Knight Moves.
Oh, thank you, Internet, for restoring my faith in your ability to make me laugh until my stomach hurts.
I'm dimly amused at the reaction to Flack saying, "Douchebag" in last week's episode of CSI:NY. He was referring to Timothy McVeigh, for Christ's sake, who blew up the federal building in Oklahoma City. As a victim of a much smaller bombing himself, it's hardly surprising that Flack would hold such sentiments. It's more surprising that he chose to lob such mild invective. As a seasoned New York cop, I'm sure he has access to choicer profanity.
Honestly; the man is an adult living in New York City. Why is it so shocking that he'd have a potty mouth? "Rush to Judgment" told us that Stella had never heard Flack curse, but that doesn't mean he doesn't. Maybe his mother told him not to curse when in the company of women. I'm sure he curses like a sailor when he's with friends. It's part of the fabric of city life. It's not a black mark on his character if he swears. I swear profusely, and I'm neither a man nor a resident of NYC. It's a natural byproduct of human language, as necessary and integral as idioms and regional colloquialisms.
But maybe I'm biased, because in my head, Flack curses like a longshoreman when he's mad or stressed and uses profanity to great erotic effect in bed. Who hasn't let a "fuck," "shit", or "pussy" fly when the sex is good? Not to mention the myriad of other slang terms for sex and its requisite equipment on offer?
Do people really think Flack goes through life like this?
Danny: Flack, the suspect's gettin' away!
Flack: I got him, Danno! Tip top!
(There's a feverish pursuit, during which the perp kicks Flack in the nuts.)
F(wheezing): Oh, darn it! That hurt like the dickens. Ouch. How aggravating.
D: He got away.
F: Oh, fiddlesticks. I'll get the hoodlum next time.
~Eyeroll~
Adults curse. Even articulate, smart, hot TV characters you want to hammer like a tenpenny nail. Put on your big girl panties and cope.
And then, as I surf your endless ocean, I find something like this, a sentence so wondrous in its badness that I bow before its awesome power.
...my cunt makes a disappointed queeb sound as we separate.
No, this immortal nugget of prose springs not from bad fanfiction or from the blog of a horny but inexperienced teenager. It comes from published "profic," and there's more where that came from.
Behold Knight Moves.
Oh, thank you, Internet, for restoring my faith in your ability to make me laugh until my stomach hurts.
I'm dimly amused at the reaction to Flack saying, "Douchebag" in last week's episode of CSI:NY. He was referring to Timothy McVeigh, for Christ's sake, who blew up the federal building in Oklahoma City. As a victim of a much smaller bombing himself, it's hardly surprising that Flack would hold such sentiments. It's more surprising that he chose to lob such mild invective. As a seasoned New York cop, I'm sure he has access to choicer profanity.
Honestly; the man is an adult living in New York City. Why is it so shocking that he'd have a potty mouth? "Rush to Judgment" told us that Stella had never heard Flack curse, but that doesn't mean he doesn't. Maybe his mother told him not to curse when in the company of women. I'm sure he curses like a sailor when he's with friends. It's part of the fabric of city life. It's not a black mark on his character if he swears. I swear profusely, and I'm neither a man nor a resident of NYC. It's a natural byproduct of human language, as necessary and integral as idioms and regional colloquialisms.
But maybe I'm biased, because in my head, Flack curses like a longshoreman when he's mad or stressed and uses profanity to great erotic effect in bed. Who hasn't let a "fuck," "shit", or "pussy" fly when the sex is good? Not to mention the myriad of other slang terms for sex and its requisite equipment on offer?
Do people really think Flack goes through life like this?
Danny: Flack, the suspect's gettin' away!
Flack: I got him, Danno! Tip top!
(There's a feverish pursuit, during which the perp kicks Flack in the nuts.)
F(wheezing): Oh, darn it! That hurt like the dickens. Ouch. How aggravating.
D: He got away.
F: Oh, fiddlesticks. I'll get the hoodlum next time.
~Eyeroll~
Adults curse. Even articulate, smart, hot TV characters you want to hammer like a tenpenny nail. Put on your big girl panties and cope.