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There's quite a thread going on the TalkCSI boards about Danny and Lindsay and their Big Development. I'm tempted to amble in and offer my twenty dollars two cents, but I've waxed so furiously on the subject for so long that it would be like an aged and toothless lioness leaping onto the decomposing corpse of a wildebeest and gumming it in a show of dominance. I'm sure most of my long-suffering readers could recite my diatribe verbatim. The slicker ones have probably had earplugs jammed into their tormented ear canals for the last hundred iterations and have learned to smile and nod and offer a tired "Amen" in all the right places just so I won't feel like I'm shouting into an empty barrel.
I don't have to wait for the D/L drama llama to stagger out of the starting gate to know this storyline will be a disaster; I have precedent on my side.
CSI:NY writers are not Criminal Minds writers or NCIS writers or Numbers writers. These writers have a firm grasp on not only continuity, but on pacing and nuance and emotional credibility. They carefully consider how potential actions will affect their characters and their audience's perception of them. These writers are also able to assess a storyline or character's efficacy and make changes if necessary. When NCIS realized Dir. Sheppard and her crazy crusade weren't working, she and her Daddy issues were quietly scuppered in an effective way that helped the show. Granted, Lauren Holly might have decided to leave, but the writers were smart enough to leave themselves trapdoors in case she did.
The NY writers are not smart. They aren't even competent most of the time. They ignore continuity when it's inconvenient to the story they want to tell in a given episode, and they have an unassailable history of dropping storylines when they're no longer fun to play with.
A few examples:
Louie: Oh, Louie, you had so much potential. When Sonny first alluded to Familia Messer having ties to Tanglewood in the bygone year of S1, I thought he meant Danny, but then you appeared in "Trapped". The way Stella encouraged Danny to return your call, I expected to see more of you. When you got your head caved in "Run Silent, Run Deep," I was sure it was the beginning of a juicy storyline ripe with Messer family drama. I thought we'd see Danny at your bedside at least once in the coming episodes.
But apparently, they sent you to Kingdom Hospital, where patients go in, but never come out. We've never seen or heard from you again.
Then there is the mystery of Stella's upbringing. In S1, she tells a smirking juvenile delinquent that she spent 18 years at St. Basil's Orphanage, but by S3, she's a foster child whose older foster sister killed their foster father to save Stella from the clutches of Chester Molester. Guess St. Basil's was just too boring. Better to have the unfettered, prurient angst orgy of nasty, lecherous foster fathers who might want to do disgusting things to innocent little girls.
Better yet, Stella, who doesn't believe past wrongs should excuse present misdeeds, lets her murdering foster sister go because she had it rough, and besides, the dirty old goat had it coming.
If that weren't enough, poor Stella is exposed to HIV in "Heart of Glass" and has to take drugs that might make her violently ill. Do we ever see her so much as woozy or green around the gills? Nope. She never so much as complains of a headache. Either the ER nurse gave her shitty, Mexican knockoffs, or the writers couldn't be assed to have Melina hug the porcelain for a take or two. And when the writers got bored with playing "Does she or doesn't she?" they had Mac pull a military contact out of his ass to get her the results in days. How that works when the window period is 12 weeks, I don't know.
Oooh, and then there's Mac, who is a grumpy douche cankle to everyone. He fires Aiden for thinking about tampering with evidence and yells at Hawkes for knowing a victim for an hour, but fails to so much as admonish Lindsay for a)leaving evidence unattended b)leaving a crime scene without explanation or c)boning her co-worker, which is probably against departmental policy. And he blithely investigates Reed's mugging, Stella's shooting of Frankie, and the bombing in which he was involved and Flack was nearly killed.
Which brings us to Flack. It was fun to show Flack all blown up, but not fun to address the issue at all after the fact. Never mind that Eddie Cahill would've chewed on those scenes like they were top sirloin.
Oh, and Mac was accessory to a murder he helped cover up at fourteen, but that won't get him into any trouble. Nope. Nor will blackmailing his superiors.
Whatever happened to that leaked memo that had Sinclair's pants in such a bunch? The liaison from the mayor's office? Hawkes needing extra shifts to make his bills? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
I could list another fifty-four instances of rampant inconsistency in D/L alone, but my fingers don't have that type of stamina. The point is that NY writers lack the talent or the discipline to pull this off. They'll play with the story until the baby becomes inconvenient, and then they'll drop it as best they can. Aside from the inevitable sweeps drama, when the kid will be kidnapped by a crazed Sonny Sassone out for revenge, no one will mention it. Neither Danny nor Lindsay will ever look like the shambling undead after sleeping forty seconds the night before. Neither will be late for work because the sitter was late or couldn't get there. Nor will they bicker over whose turn it is to do the colic march at butt o'clock in the morning. Everyone, including Mac, who will be two CSIs short on occasion, will heartily endorse this blessed event.
They will become Pod People, bent impossibly out of true to accommodate this ill-conceived(and I mean that in every sense of the word)pestilence.
And please, God, spare us the birthing scene. I don't want to see any of the rolls that come from Lindsay's breadbasket.
And what are they going to do if Anna Belknap decides to quit? Do they even have a contingency plan? If they kill her off, then Danny gets the baby, which would almost necessitate that he either quit or foist the sprog on his parents. If she just leaves, then either she becomes a SAHM mother or drags the baby off to Montana and Clan Monroe, which, you know, turned out such a specimen with Lindsay.
If the prop guys have any sense, Messer Jr. will be nothing but a whoopie cushion wrapped in bunting. That way, when it's all but forgotten, we can be treated to this scene:
Danny(comes home and plops on couch. There's a mournful bleat from his backside).
Lindsay(from the kitchen): Danny, do you need the Bean-o?
Danny(rummages underneath butt until he pulls out a whoopie cushion in a rumpled blanket): Uh, no(looks vaguely guilty as he surveys a wilted "Junior"). No, I'm good. (He tosses "Junior" over the back of the couch, where "he" begins to wail.
Oh, boy, oh, boy. I can't wait.
I don't have to wait for the D/L drama llama to stagger out of the starting gate to know this storyline will be a disaster; I have precedent on my side.
CSI:NY writers are not Criminal Minds writers or NCIS writers or Numbers writers. These writers have a firm grasp on not only continuity, but on pacing and nuance and emotional credibility. They carefully consider how potential actions will affect their characters and their audience's perception of them. These writers are also able to assess a storyline or character's efficacy and make changes if necessary. When NCIS realized Dir. Sheppard and her crazy crusade weren't working, she and her Daddy issues were quietly scuppered in an effective way that helped the show. Granted, Lauren Holly might have decided to leave, but the writers were smart enough to leave themselves trapdoors in case she did.
The NY writers are not smart. They aren't even competent most of the time. They ignore continuity when it's inconvenient to the story they want to tell in a given episode, and they have an unassailable history of dropping storylines when they're no longer fun to play with.
A few examples:
Louie: Oh, Louie, you had so much potential. When Sonny first alluded to Familia Messer having ties to Tanglewood in the bygone year of S1, I thought he meant Danny, but then you appeared in "Trapped". The way Stella encouraged Danny to return your call, I expected to see more of you. When you got your head caved in "Run Silent, Run Deep," I was sure it was the beginning of a juicy storyline ripe with Messer family drama. I thought we'd see Danny at your bedside at least once in the coming episodes.
But apparently, they sent you to Kingdom Hospital, where patients go in, but never come out. We've never seen or heard from you again.
Then there is the mystery of Stella's upbringing. In S1, she tells a smirking juvenile delinquent that she spent 18 years at St. Basil's Orphanage, but by S3, she's a foster child whose older foster sister killed their foster father to save Stella from the clutches of Chester Molester. Guess St. Basil's was just too boring. Better to have the unfettered, prurient angst orgy of nasty, lecherous foster fathers who might want to do disgusting things to innocent little girls.
Better yet, Stella, who doesn't believe past wrongs should excuse present misdeeds, lets her murdering foster sister go because she had it rough, and besides, the dirty old goat had it coming.
If that weren't enough, poor Stella is exposed to HIV in "Heart of Glass" and has to take drugs that might make her violently ill. Do we ever see her so much as woozy or green around the gills? Nope. She never so much as complains of a headache. Either the ER nurse gave her shitty, Mexican knockoffs, or the writers couldn't be assed to have Melina hug the porcelain for a take or two. And when the writers got bored with playing "Does she or doesn't she?" they had Mac pull a military contact out of his ass to get her the results in days. How that works when the window period is 12 weeks, I don't know.
Oooh, and then there's Mac, who is a grumpy douche cankle to everyone. He fires Aiden for thinking about tampering with evidence and yells at Hawkes for knowing a victim for an hour, but fails to so much as admonish Lindsay for a)leaving evidence unattended b)leaving a crime scene without explanation or c)boning her co-worker, which is probably against departmental policy. And he blithely investigates Reed's mugging, Stella's shooting of Frankie, and the bombing in which he was involved and Flack was nearly killed.
Which brings us to Flack. It was fun to show Flack all blown up, but not fun to address the issue at all after the fact. Never mind that Eddie Cahill would've chewed on those scenes like they were top sirloin.
Oh, and Mac was accessory to a murder he helped cover up at fourteen, but that won't get him into any trouble. Nope. Nor will blackmailing his superiors.
Whatever happened to that leaked memo that had Sinclair's pants in such a bunch? The liaison from the mayor's office? Hawkes needing extra shifts to make his bills? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
I could list another fifty-four instances of rampant inconsistency in D/L alone, but my fingers don't have that type of stamina. The point is that NY writers lack the talent or the discipline to pull this off. They'll play with the story until the baby becomes inconvenient, and then they'll drop it as best they can. Aside from the inevitable sweeps drama, when the kid will be kidnapped by a crazed Sonny Sassone out for revenge, no one will mention it. Neither Danny nor Lindsay will ever look like the shambling undead after sleeping forty seconds the night before. Neither will be late for work because the sitter was late or couldn't get there. Nor will they bicker over whose turn it is to do the colic march at butt o'clock in the morning. Everyone, including Mac, who will be two CSIs short on occasion, will heartily endorse this blessed event.
They will become Pod People, bent impossibly out of true to accommodate this ill-conceived(and I mean that in every sense of the word)pestilence.
And please, God, spare us the birthing scene. I don't want to see any of the rolls that come from Lindsay's breadbasket.
And what are they going to do if Anna Belknap decides to quit? Do they even have a contingency plan? If they kill her off, then Danny gets the baby, which would almost necessitate that he either quit or foist the sprog on his parents. If she just leaves, then either she becomes a SAHM mother or drags the baby off to Montana and Clan Monroe, which, you know, turned out such a specimen with Lindsay.
If the prop guys have any sense, Messer Jr. will be nothing but a whoopie cushion wrapped in bunting. That way, when it's all but forgotten, we can be treated to this scene:
Danny(comes home and plops on couch. There's a mournful bleat from his backside).
Lindsay(from the kitchen): Danny, do you need the Bean-o?
Danny(rummages underneath butt until he pulls out a whoopie cushion in a rumpled blanket): Uh, no(looks vaguely guilty as he surveys a wilted "Junior"). No, I'm good. (He tosses "Junior" over the back of the couch, where "he" begins to wail.
Oh, boy, oh, boy. I can't wait.