Because I'd Like to Avoid Federal Prison

My mother is up to her meddling machinations again. This time, the lawyers mailed some information about my father's estate to my mother's address in the mistaken belief that I live there, because, you know, no gimp could possibly live independently of their parents. Rather than bring me the envelope, SHE READ THE CONTENTS AND RESEALED THE ENVELOPE WITH TAPE BEFORE BRINGING IT OVER. Because clearly, I'm too stupid to notice a wodge of tape over an envelope seal. When I confronted her about it, she admitted to snooping and said, "I read it because I'm your mother and I'm nosy."

Oh, really? Well, then you won't mind if I open your mail? I've always wanted to know how much you squander on bullshit while berating me for daring to spend more than forty dollars a week on groceries.

So, the lawyers are going to get an earful in the morning.

And because I need something to take my mind off the blinding rage my mother inspires:

( Because I'd Like to Avoid Federal Prison )

I don't know what he's doing, but he should feel free to keep doing it.