Pas de Deux Again

According to my blood tests, I should live to be 134. My cholesterol was low, my white count was good and my red count was better. However, I'm still having odd, intermittent pains, so my doctor prescribed a course of Cipro to rule out a latent bladder infection. She also told me that if I'm still feeling lurgy or the pains worsen, I should come back, and she'll perform an abdominal and pelvic ultrasound sans wand. If anything hinky shows up, only then will she perform a pelvic, and she'll make sure I'm stoned off my ass. If it's still not working, she'll arrange to have the local hospital gas me and render me unconscious while it's done.

Honestly, I'm beginning to think I'm just heroically constipated.

I watched most of CSI:NY tonight, and was it my imagination, or did Flack, upholder of the law, steal a doughnut from a street vendor?